"SIT LIKE A LADY"
I am sorry I can't hear you over the sound of L chewing lollipops.
my personality varies from unbearably clingy to disturbingly distant and there is no inbetween
my hobbies include staying up until 2am for no reason and being exhausted the next day
Earlier today, I served as the “young woman’s voice” in a panel of local experts at a Girl Scouts speaking event. One question for the panel was something to the effect of, "Should parents read their daughter’s texts or monitor her online activity for bad language and inappropriate content?"
I was surprised when the first panelist answered the question as if it were about cyberbullying. The adult audience nodded sagely as she spoke about the importance of protecting children online.
I reached for the microphone next. I said, “As far as reading your child’s texts or logging into their social media profiles, I would say 99.9% of the time, do not do that.”
Looks of total shock answered me. I actually saw heads jerk back in surprise. Even some of my fellow panelists blinked.
Everyone stared as I explained that going behind a child’s back in such a way severs the bond of trust with the parent. When I said, “This is the most effective way to ensure that your child never tells you anything,” it was like I’d delivered a revelation.
It’s easy to talk about the disconnect between the old and the young, but I don’t think I’d ever been so slapped in the face by the reality of it. It was clear that for most of the parents I spoke to, the idea of such actions as a violation had never occurred to them at all.
It alarms me how quickly adults forget that children are people.
Apparently people are rediscovering this post somehow and I think that’s pretty cool! Having experienced similar violations of trust in my youth, this is an important issue to me, so I want to add my personal story:
Around age 13, I tried to express to my mother that I thought I might have clinical depression, and she snapped at me “not to joke about things like that.” I stopped telling my mother when I felt depressed.
Around age 15, I caught my mother reading my diary. She confessed that any time she saw me write in my diary, she would sneak into my room and read it, because I only wrote when I was upset. I stopped keeping a diary.
Around age 18, I had an emotional breakdown while on vacation because I didn’t want to go to college. I ended up seeing a therapist for - surprise surprise - depression.
Around age 21, I spoke on this panel with my mother in the audience, and afterwards I mentioned the diary incident to her with respect to this particular Q&A. Her eyes welled up, and she said, “You know I read those because I was worried you were depressed and going to hurt yourself, right?”
TL;DR: When you invade your child’s privacy, you communicate three things:
- You do not respect their rights as an individual.
- You do not trust them to navigate problems or seek help on their own.
- You probably haven’t been listening to them.
Information about almost every issue that you think you have to snoop for can probably be obtained by communicating with and listening to your child.
|· suicide tw ·|
thats a cool skeleton fresh from skeleton hell
I SCROLLED THROUGH MY LIKES FOR AN HOUR TO FIND THIS
2. luv u
3. love you
4. i love you
5. I HATE YOU SO FUCKING MUCH
|· tru ·|
******Hey guys, I have an important post.********
If you’ve been following me, you know that my family’s financial situation is very bad right now. My mom is a single mother on a low teacher’s salary, taking an expensive college AQ course to possibly up her salary (though that’s not guaranteed). We have three dogs, who have various health problems that are very expensive, and I have health problems and medications myself that aren’t all covered. My estranged father, who abused and stalked (and still stalks) me, has illegally stopped paying child support for me, and we will have to go to court over it, meaning a lawyer we can’t afford. Our car is constantly having expensive problems and we can’t pay most of our bills anymore. I’ve been trying to get a job for a long time to help with this but because I should have graduated high school by now and haven’t (I’m in an alternative education plan, here’s a post explaining all that), nobody will hire me. (It doesn’t help that I have a severe anxiety disorder and can barely leave my house as of right now.) We can’t buy groceries anymore, my nana is paying for all our food and other expenses, all my mom’s credit cards are maxed out and her bank account is essentially empty- she already emptied her retirement fund completely. Our small house that we rent is no longer something we can afford and it’s a matter of time before we lose it. Because of the lack of child support, we will be homeless and have to go live in one room of my nana’s house, which is unfair to her, but also our dogs, and unfortunately me because she criticizes just about everything about me and it would be a very bad place for me to be every day. As of right now, my mom and I are just trying to make it through the next month, day by day. We’re doing everything we can to get money, hoping that if we can just make our rent for a month or two longer and manage to go to court and get my child support payments back, then we would have enough money to get a cheap apartment. This is the goal. We’re having a huge garage sale and selling much of our other stuff, I’m babysitting as much as I can and my mom is probably going to get a job waitress-ing for the month of August until her work and college course start up, and I am still desperately trying to get hired somewhere.
But, the point of this post!!!!! I am selling many of my clothes, shoes, jewelry and make-up to help contribute to our savings jar. There’s nothing over $20, almost all of it has never been worn, and in my opinion it’s all very cute!
I’m really begging you guys to please check it out and see if there’s anything you like and/or can afford, and if not, please please please reblog this to spread it around, every penny counts right now and we could use this so so much, both my mom and I haven’t really slept in weeks, we’re so stressed out knowing any day now we won’t have a home.
I do not spew profanities. I enunciate them clearly, like a fucking lady.
|· me ·|
me talking to the rest of the class before a big test
Details from the Egyptian Tomb of Sennedjem in the necropolis of Deir el-Medina. Sennedjem lived in the reigns of Seti I and Ramesses II during the 19th Dynasty.
Photos courtesy of & taken by kairoinfo4u.
|· inspo ·|
Creepy☆Cute Makeup Tutorial Bloopers HAHA